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Thursday, September 16, 2010

Caught Red Handed

Remember this picture? It reveals my heart.

This is my sweet and mischievous four-year-old’s response to being buckled in a seatbelt instead of playing outside set free for a long afternoon. A washable red marker in another child’s backpack helps him express himself.

As a kid I comply with my parents’ requests. I agree to clean my room, come home early or help around the house. The crazy part in my brain the phrase but you can’t make me like it rules. It seems that just by thinking these words, by exercising something that only I am in control of, I am happy. Yuck!

This behavior by my son reminds me of that phrase. As an adult my rebellion plays out a little differently. I don’t have a parent to punish me if I don’t comply. I have real life consequences. If I don’t sit down and pay my bills I have late fees or worse. If I don’t plan dinner, hungry kids make a chaotic evening drag on way too long.

Rebellion is a nasty sin. These days I don’t want to be rebellious but I certainly have a tendency to exhibit that same you-can’t-make-me-like-it attitude. I choose to indulge myself over serving my family. I choose to read a good story instead of God’s Word. I choose my goals over my husband’s. I choose what I feel I deserve over what I really need.

And in the end, I get caught red-handed. Duties go undone. Children get needy. Communication lines get muddy.

I’ve been caught red-handed! Today I’m asking God to wash my “red” hands and make them clean again. Today I’m asking God to realign my priorities. Today I’m asking God to help me with the mundane, necessary stuff.

And I’m also asking Him to help me like it!

Who may climb the mountain of the Lord?
      Who may stand in his holy place?
Only those whose hands [are clean] and hearts are pure,
      who do not worship idols
      and never tell lies.
They will receive the Lord’s blessing
      and have a right relationship with God their savior.
Psalm 24:3-5


Denise said...

Praying for you sis.

andrea frazer said...

That's a tough one and something I struggle with all the time. I suppose it's that old analogy that our kids have to trust us, so we have to trust Our Father also. But you already said that. But since I'm such a baby at this, I like repetition. Over and over and over. That works for me.