This time of year always finds my heart beating fast. Sports seasons begin to overlap. Everyone is worn out from the demands of homework and early rising. The sunshine beckons us outside in the afternoons instead of tending to the chores that keep us on schedule. We’re just tired. Ready for summer and tired.
At the top of my spring-rapidly-beating-heart list this year is my quickly approaching oncology appointment, impending treatment, sale of our home, relocation to a new one, my husband’s new job, our children's new school and finding a new church. Whew! I can’t make my heart rate slow down and I don’t like that. I wish all the fast beating would burn some calories! But since it doesn’t and it’s not good for me, I need to find some space. A place to go where my heart can slow down and I can breathe deeply.
I know that place is the secret place with Jesus. I just have to remind myself to go there. I want to learn to dwell there. I can find thankfulness in the fast paces when they force me to turn to Jesus.
Last night, my heart rested here:
“Help, God—the bottom has fallen out of my life! Master, hear my cry for help!
Listen hard! Open your ears!
Listen to my cries for mercy.
If you, God, kept records on wrongdoings,
who would stand a chance?
As it turns out, forgiveness is your habit, and that's why you're worshiped.
I pray to God—my life a prayer— and wait for what he'll say and do.
My life's on the line before God, my Lord, waiting and watching till morning, waiting and watching till morning.
O Lisa, wait and watch for God— with God's arrival comes love, with God's arrival comes generous redemption.
No doubt about it—he'll redeem Lisa, buy back Lisa from captivity to sin…
I've cultivated a quiet heart. Like a baby content in its mother's arms, my soul is a baby content. Wait, Lisa, for God. Wait with hope. Hope now; hope always!
From Psalm 130-131 The Message