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Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Operation No Fear

Thank you to my friends who have all encouraged me so much as I begin my journey to battle fear. Your stories inspire me, you prayers encourage me and just knowing you're all rooting for me has truly kept me going.

If I tried to recount the details of week one of 2010, you would all be staring at your computers will your mouths open. So I'll just give you the short version. You know my take on it all.

Last year I was determined to say yes. Yes to God anytime, anything He asked. Saying yes opens a door. Saying yes births a new beginning. Saying yes yields to opportunity. Saying yes is actually quite fun because I love the aftermath.

Saying no to fear has been a little different. In the last week I've been bedridden with serious illness and basically everything I hold dearly including my dreams, future, friendships and security feel threatened right now. Weird. New Year's Day I am singing singing the praises of 2009 and I literally could not sleep last night because of panic, anxiety and illness. I read Isaiah 41 over and over again. The parts I have memorized, I recited until I feel asleep.

Last night Isaiah 41 was like taking out a shining sheath from a hidden place. (Percy Jackson's ballpoint pen, anyone?) I literally saw it slice through the darkness, illuminate the scary, shadowy places and defeat fear. Who knew I was a chronic worrier? Who knew my most common thoughts were contrary to the Word of God? Serious, who knew? I can't remember the last time I was afraid to sleep at night or the last time my mind went so far into what if land I was panicking. Seriously.

I am memorizing it in The Message as soon as possible. For a few reasons...It seems when you ask fear to go it manifests in every area of your life. Every.single.one. And did you see that last verse? Confident, exuberant, expansive. Now that's worth sticking it out for! More later. For now I've got get memorizing. It's only January 6!

"But you, Israel, are my servant.
You're Jacob, my first choice,
descendants of my good friend Abraham.
I pulled you in from all over the world,
called you in from every dark corner of the earth,
Don't panic. I'm with you.
There's no need to fear for I'm your God.
I'll give you strength. I'll help you.
I'll hold you steady, keep a firm grip on you.
"Count on it: Everyone who had it in for you
will end up out in the cold—
real losers.
Those who worked against you
will end up empty-handed—
nothing to show for their lives.
When you go out looking for your old adversaries
you won't find them—
Not a trace of your old enemies,
not even a memory.
That's right. Because I, your God,
have a firm grip on you and I'm not letting go.
I'm telling you, 'Don't panic.
I'm right here to help you.'
"Do you feel like a lowly worm, Jacob?
Don't be afraid.
Feel like a fragile insect, Israel?
I'll help you.
I, God, want to reassure you.
The God who buys you back, The Holy of Israel.
I'm transforming you from worm to harrow,
from insect to iron.
As a sharp-toothed harrow you'll smooth out the mountains,
turn those tough old hills into loamy soil.
You'll open the rough ground to the weather,
to the blasts of sun and wind and rain.
But you'll be confident and exuberant,
expansive in The Holy of Israel!

from Isaiah 41, The Message


B His Girl said...

The enemy is trying to do a number on you. Your are courageous and your strength is from the Lord. Take 3 giants steps and the enemy will be behind you. Your joy will be your rear guard.
Don't stop walking or let the enemy distract you Lisa. Your dream is ahead of you.
I am feeling the power of the Lord on this comment.

Bernie said...

Liz I am so sorry you have been ill and have had such a rough start to 2010.....it can and will get better Liz, keep your eyes looking upward towards the heaven, don't look down at all.
As long as you stay strong in your faith and trust God I know from the bottom of my heart all will work out well for you.....I will keep you in my heart and prayers for as long as you need me....:-) Hugs

Somethings Gotta Give said...

"Don't panic. I'm with you.
There's no need to fear for I'm your God." That is God's promise to you, hold on to that Promise, pray in the name of Jesus for Satin to flee your presence and your home.

Because Christ has the Ultimate Victory, and that Victory Lives in you.

Sometimes I have to speak against the fear, and truly recite that promise to myself over and over, until that God peace comes over me and I know everything is okay.

Thanks for being so transparent and open, it is truly amazing to know someone else who is going through this battle of fear too.

Laura said...

Oh, how good is that? He sends me pictures like that sometimes, and I treasure those moments. I will try to picture the light you saw when I read this scripture. Keep using the sword of the Spirit, Lisa! It always works.

Andrea said...

Do NOT allow the enemy to steal your joy. GOD has great things for you and HE is using you beyond what you could ask or imagine through your blog. GOD is greater than any fear you have and the battle belongs to HIM.
Blessings, hugs, and prayers, andrea

Alleluiabelle said...

Hi Lisa,

I've been where you are. There was a time in my life several years ago when anxiety was so bad that I couldn't leave my house for four months except for my husband taking me to doctor's appointments. I developed anxiety attacks the night I had an operation in the hospital and from then on it escalated.

As Andrea said, don't let the enemy steal your joy. You have strong faith, belief...this piece of Scripture speaks to my heart too and I thank you for that dear one. Anxiety and fear can make one ill physically, mentally and emotionally in ways never thought possible...and at times it certainly is terrifying, but hang on to Him, lean into Him and keep digging deep into His Word. He will give you His grace, rest and peace and so much more.

I'm so glad that you shared this tonight. It brought back many memories for me, and trusting in the Lord and leaning into Him for EVERYTHING is the only way to conquer our fears, anxieties, worries...just everything.

Hang in there sweet sister. If you ever want to e-mail me at any time just to talk, pray, or anything my address is on my website.

Hugs to you & my prayers are being said for His strong covering over and all around you.

Peace be with you,

Somethings Gotta Give said...

The Sunflower is one of my favorite books by Richard Paul Evans. Its a small book, and only 320 pages, I truly couldn't put it down. Fun reading, if your needing a little break from life.

Have a restful night, will be praying for you this evening.

sonja said...

You are not alone with the subject of fear! Most of us deal with it... I sure have and still do sometimes. BUT... the answer is still the same... HE has it covered! You are on the exact right path to be in His word and to claim His promises. Satan just loves this 'tool' in his box to trip us up. It never comes from God. My dad used to tell me..."recognize it, and
refuse it".... Keep standing on the very words you just quoted, and AS you stand, God moves us forward and deepens our faith.

sonja said...


I just re-read my comments and I have to add, what I said almost sounds like a 'pat' answer. Yet when I worry or am anxious or have fear, it doesn't seem so clear. So I have to add, I'm preaching to the choir here... it's a struggle I know, and still... the answer is the same as what I just commented, for you and me and all of us. I do know that it becomes easier as we do step out and stand on His promises! You're doing great Lisa, keep trusting!

Lora said...

Press on dear one, press on!

Andrea said...

Thank you! and Amen! Praying for you and with you

Joyful said...

Thanks for sharing that passage in the Message. WOW!!! "Confident and exuberant, expansive..." WOW!

Wondering how you're feeling now. Trust your health has returned along with your hope.