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Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Wordless not Word-less

Yesterday was a "normal" day for me. I overslept, woke sleepy, grumpy kids, a toilet overflowed, a child was running fever while painting his fingernails orange, had a teacher conference in the school parking lot, was late to bible study, my bus to a KW engagement in Houston kept departing 15 minutes earlier every time I checked my email, had the electricity go out while my son was undergoing speech evaluation and my babysitter/mother barely made it to my house in time for me to leave. That's it. What each and every "normal" day is like in my house.

When a decorated Christmas tree with pretty, beautifully wrapped presents is added to that picture, all blogging ceases because words stop flowing. That's what happened to me during the holidays. That's why there was such a long, eerie silence on this here web page. I was busy. So busy in fact, that the kids took it upon themselves to do a little Christmas decorating...

I was busy. I was wordless but not Word-less.

During the two weeks around Christmas, we traveled to Dallas, Austin, Conroe twice and Houston twice. We bought all our presents, decorated our house and grocery shopped for our traditional Christmas meal. On top of that, our two-year-old had his tonsils removed. Whew! Tired, yet?

As I sat in the hospital after his surgery I began pondering the holidays. I love the days before Christmas. Gingerbread houses, Christmas shopping and last minute decorating are my favorite parts of the season! This year, however, I simply ran out of time.

As I sat in a hospital room waiting instead of my kitchen table decorating gingerbread houses, I began to think about Mary.

How she must've been exhausted from riding that donkey but full of joy at the revelation that she was going to the place God said his Son would be born.

How she must've been frustrated when innkeepers kept saying, "No room!" but filled with awe and relief as God provided for her the mother of his Son.

How she must've been disgusted that God would allow his Son to be born into a dirty place filled with smelly animals but full of joy as she heard the shepherds tell of the heaven's rejoicing.

How she must've been disappointed as she pulled hay out of her hair and laid her Son in a feeding trough but full of joy as God revealed how he was using Jesus to bring light into dark places.

How she must've hurt that the whole world didn't come to see her Son, His only Son, but rejoiced as the wise men came from a faraway place.

Somehow, I don't think that very first Christmas went quite the way Mary envisioned it. I don't know how Mary was able to celebrate in that barn. I mean, kinda gross, right? But she did, I feel sure, by seeing as God sees and hearing his voice.

I pondered how Mary could live with hope knowing she would lose her son and wanting him to be treated like the King of Kings. Quite simply she couldn't. Unless, she kept her dreams and God's promises always before her. I'm sure her dreams didn't look quite the way she'd envisioned them. I bet when she thought she'd be giving birth to the Son of God, she thought she had a good chance of being treated like royalty. Giving birth in a barn must've been a huge disappointment. But God was never disappointed. I believe Mary kept hope alive and disappointment away by pondering God's words to her and keeping them before her at all times.

"But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart." Luke 2:19
I pray I would do the same. At Christmas and always. Never losing sight of the dream. Always pondering the words God has spoken to my heart.

"Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished!" Luke 1:45

What dreams has God breathed into your heart that have yet to be accomplished? How does living the dream look different than what you thought? It may a holiday dream or an everyday dream, either way let's ponder His voice together and send disappointment far from our hearts. Let's keep on believing together!

Thanks for the reminder, B!


Kathryn, Michael and Alex said...

I think we can only be disappointed if the dreams are ours and not from the Lord...He always keeps His promise. May our focus always be on Him.

Renee said...

I second that! I am finding a lot that my dreams are not His dreams! I sure would rather be doing what I want and not putting my lazy feet to the pavement that is for sure. But I do rejoice in the fact that He did come to save us even if it's not the way that we would have envisioned a King being born into this world!

Melanie said...

What a day! I can relate to your day.
But...what a God!!!